Fall Fun (part 2)

For the second half of Derek's Fall Break, I had to make sure we accomplished one group of tasks that has become kind of its own...strange tradition, if you will. You see, last year he showed up after 8 weeks away at school in dire need of a haircut--both because enough time had elapsed since his previous one, just before he left for the semester...and it was easier (or if you happen to have the Parental Translation App running in your brain, which automatically corrected that to "lazier",  you'd be spot-on) to go to the regular place at home, rather than figuring out how to get groomed on campus or in Columbia. Plus, Riley was on the same...shearing schedule...so it made sense to make that the first item on the weekend To Do List.

The second thing added was just as critical, but admittedly less pleasant: annual flu shots for both boys. (Don't worry, though; I'd gotten mine ahead of time, since I have to seek out a provider that carries the egg-free version. Stab-in-the-arm-without-nasty-repercussion, check! Because I could just tell you were concerned...) And last, rounding out the super-fun chores, we had (drumroll) "purchasing some pumpkins, to lend the house a dose of harvest-time flair", FTW.

TBT 2016. Babies!

So, last October, with a stroke of, I don't know...seasonal luck, or something...we stumbled upon a one-stop-shopping kind of deal. There's a retail center a few minutes from our neighborhood that contains both a Great Clips and a Harris Teeter. And we discovered to our surprise that not only did the HT boast an impressive selection of the large orange gourds, neatly arrayed in boxes on their sidewalk for one's perusal...but its pharmacy turned out to be a quick-and-easy place to obtain the vaccine.

Well...since it had gone so smoothly in our prior experience, we therefore decided to return to the scene of the...Autumn victory of 2018...or whatever...and hopefully repeat the process. The only hiccup came (because there had to be one, right?) when I approached Derek to confirm the final details of the plan. "So, we'll go Saturday morning?" I asked nonchalantly--fully expecting this to be Step One, with Step Two consisting of a haggling session over the actual departure time, given the tendency of the college student to sleep in as late as possible whenever he can. However, he immediately replied, "Sure. I need to be back by 11, though."

Folks...I confess that I was...flabbergasted by this revelation. "Um...I'm sorry, perhaps I misunderstood? You'd like to be finished...before you usually get out of bed? How does that even, you know...work?" He shot me an exasperated look and in a tone of mild disbelief answered, "I want to see the end of Gameday!" Then he proceeded to rattle off the "very important matchups" that would be taking place at noon, and 3:30, ending with, "My whole day is accounted for, Mom, so we'd better get this taken care of first thing!" (To his credit, the DUH was implied, but respectfully not stated. And to be honest, he's got a point--what was I thinking on a Saturday during the College Football Season? Seriously, I. Know. Better. But still? Siiiighhhhhh....dudes and sports, amiright?)

Anyway, that's how we found ourselves headed out much earlier than I expected, to whirlwind those errands and return to HQ before whatever the heck happens in the last half-hour of the celebrated ESPN pre-game broadcast. (I'm just being dramatic, as I'm actually well aware of the guest picker, hat shenanigans, and other assorted antics that occur on the show. Let's roll with it, 'kay?) First we took advantage of the online check-in system to eliminate the we-don't-have-time-for-this waiting, and buzzed Great Clips. (Yeah, pun intended. Sorry not sorry...) Freshly coiffed teenagers, D-O-N-E.

Then we motored over to the grocery store to get all protected from...evil viruses and whatnot. The entertainment during this portion of our activities was provided by the machine that measures your vital signs--you know the one found in almost every drugstore. The goofball brothers took turns sticking their arms in and having their blood pressure, pulse--and even weight--recorded...none of which seemed tremendously accurate, but offered them a fresh excuse to laugh at and tease each other good-naturedly while passing the time. Because heaven forbid we sit still and act our ages for 5 freakin' minutes, right? Sheesh...I swear, sometimes when they get together it's like having toddlers all over again, I tell ya... (Yet they do amuse me--though if you tell them this, I promise I will vehemently deny it.)

Finally, it was time to examine the pumpkins and pick some that we deemed sufficiently attractive to grace our steps for the next couple of weeks or so. (Halloween...or whenever the deer get bold enough to come right up to the house and munch on them. True story--they're absolutely shameless where we live...) Riley approached pretty much the first one he saw, grabbed it, and declared that he was satisfied. Incidentally, he was also the one who'd declared to me privately that "You don't have to get pumpkins just for me, Mom. I'm fine if we skip it." To which I responded, "Oh, honey. What makes you think this little field trip is about you kids? I don't care how old you guys get, porch pumpkins are non-negotiable!"

However...I might have reconsidered that stance when Derek hefted the most ginormous one he could get his arms around, turned to me with a wicked grin and a troublemaker's gleam in his eye...and inquired as to whether he could chuck it to the ground and see how much splatter it would create. Ahem...that would be a HARD NO...sweetie. Now put the  20-pound monstrosity down, and focus for 2 seconds, would you? Fortunately, it was only a short time later that he identified a more suitable option, and all we had left to do was haul them inside to pay the nice people. Success!

As the culminating event, once we get our new acquisitions safely home and arranged in position, I always use them as a backdrop for a few photos of my beloved sons. They've been around long enough to understand that their mother is going to require pictures on a regular basis, so they bow to my demands fairly gracefully. Sometimes (see "one year ago" for reference) there is an inordinate amount of horsing around, just to achieve an acceptable shot. Rarely--2019, for example--the weather plays a role, leading to the almost inconceivable scenario of both boys...standing completely motionless...calmly looking towards me...and even smiling (although if Derek could for the love of all things holy keep his eyes open when facing a camera it would be a gosh-darned miracle. I'm just sayin'...) Hmm...apparently they cooperate beautifully when they want to get inside, away from the rain. Who knew? (Tucking that away for future reference, just in case it comes in handy...)

And there you have it...a somewhat odd Fall Break agenda...but I think we nailed it. And with that, I just realized it's mid-October already. That can only mean there's a new job that must be tackled: everyone get out there and start stocking up on all the good candy! I mean, why wait for trick-or-treaters? Nah, let's hear it for...a Fortnight of Chocolate! Whoo hoo! (Patent pending. Feel free to use as desired and/or required to get through the next several weeks of dropping temperatures and fading daylight. You're welcome!)