Sunday, December 31, 2017

December 2017 Maryland-palooza: the Frost Awakens

Team WestEnders kicked off our Winter expedition to the motherland on Wednesday evening, with Derek behind the wheel for his customary first shift of the journey. We left behind a rather balmy...ish...December day, with the mercury having climbed to a peak of 46 in Chapel Hill during the afternoon. By the time we stopped for our first driver switch and refreshment/facilities break in Virginia, however, we definitely noticed a downward trend on ye olde thermometer. In fact, I believe my quote was a startled and somewhat disgruntled, "It's 20...fun-lovin' degrees out here, guys!"

And when we arrived at our second and final pause, it had bottomed out...at 16. So let's try to rationalize this: we drive 300 miles north...and lose THIRTY DEGREES? Now, I don't know what kind of crazy newfangled math this is supposed to be, but I can tell you unequivocally that I. Don't Like It. (Meanwhile, the polar bear half of my family--you know, we call them "sons"--was unsympathetic to my shivering. Derek's response was a scoffing, "It's not even that bad!" And Riley shrugged and commented philosophically, "Eh, it's the North!" Thanks, guys...you're both grounded, by the way...)

Anyway, we reached our destination safely, and settled in to enjoy our stay. Thursday's entire agenda can be summed up as "Hangin' with the H-clan",  since we designated the time to spend with our hosts. The morning began with the earlier risers of the bunch--their teenage son...and me--in the living room watching a Netflix show called Ultimate Beastmaster, which he'd turned on when he woke up. The best way I can describe it is that it's kind of like a pumped-up version of American Ninja Warrior, with a competition involving a super-risky and nearly impossible obstacle course that the participants try to complete, for points (and the cash prize, naturally).

Why am I even mentioning this, you might be wondering? Because one-by-one, as each member of the household emerged from slumber and congregated in the kitchen, we all got totally sucked into this program. Eventually we noticed that the one who'd started us down this path had actually LEFT, and yet the rest of us were still mesmerized by the televised stunts...that is, until Mrs. H suddenly exclaimed, "So, what are we DOING today? and reminded us that we should come up with other activities in lieu of binge-watching a marathon of this silly stuff for hours on end.

So, the adolescent male gang made their bi-annual pilgrimage to...the local Safeway supermarket. On this outing, their purchases consisted of: a bag of donuts, a box of chocolate croissants, and a ginormous deli sub that the 3 of them planned to share for lunch. This isn't counting the package of mini-donuts, tube of Mentos, and OTHER sandwiches they consumed after paying for them, but before leaving the store. Hey, at least it...keeps them off the street? Yeeeaaah, we'll go with that...

Afterwards, despite the icy wind and sub-zero temps, they played outside on and off all afternoon--with my children even going so far as to commit to long pants, hats, and gloves, so you KNOW it was "chilly". But really, I have no room to talk, since I bundled up, myself, to take a walk in spite of the uncomfortable conditions. I might not have been able to feel my toes...face...or legs...when I was finished, but I got my steps for the day, doggone it! (And hot tea...LOTS of that...) Finally, we rewarded ourselves for our--I don't know...hardiness?--with a delectable meal at a local joint called BJ's Roadhouse, where we packed on the calories in preparation for hibernation. (Wait, whattya mean HUMANS don't do that? Are you sure? 'Cuz it feels like the best thing to do right about now...)

Next up, we had our Friday sojourn to the former hometown...with a bit of logistical finagling to arrange first. You see, I had coffee and lunch dates scheduled with friends, and Derek was meeting a couple of buddies for an afternoon of shenanigans...none of which involved either Husband or Riley. So in consultation with Mr. and Mrs. H, it was decided that I (as the only one who is capable of handling a manual transmission--Yay, me!) would borrow their Jeep to transport the first shift, while the latecomers would travel in Husband's vehicle, and join us for dinner.

Thus Derek and I set off, with me piloting a 6-speed (for the first time)...off-road tank-type-thing (much bigger than my Subaru)--such that Derek looked down and remarked, "Jeez, the cars look so little next to us!" It was, in short, an adventure in all kinds of ways. But we prevailed through the challenge (of sorts), and eventually pulled into Olney, ready to proceed with the packed social calendar: java (with a neighborhood pal), noon nosh (with college besties), and finally, the traditional gathering at CalTort, our favorite in-town eatery, with soccer fams. Since I actually had a bit of time to kill in-between engagements, I also drove to a nearby lake for what had to be one of the fastest hikes I've ever taken--if you need any explanation why, just picture the fact that both the water, and I, were partially frozen from our exposure to the surrounding air, and that should clear it up.

It was an extremely busy, somewhat exhausting, but utterly delightful kickoff to our Maryland Madness Tour, the Holiday Edition. More celebration to come...keeping my fingers crossed it gets a teensy bit warmer? (Or stocking up on cocoa, one or the other!) Stay tuned...

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Yule time, 2017

Christmas in the WestEnders household got underway at the crack of dawn...er "10 a.m."...with everyone gathered around the tree, ready to reveal their surprises.

For Derek, this meant the long-awaited FIFA 18 video game (you know, the one I forbade him from buying until he finished all of his college apps...at which point it was too close to the holiday to allow him to purchase it anyway? Yeah, that one...) His grin lit up the room as he declared, "Well, you know where I'll be for the next...12 hours!" He was exaggerating, of course, but later in the day, he seemed to be having a blast exploring some of the updated features of his game--and reporting them to us. For example, in the course of his first virtual season he "fired his manager", "received a bogus offer to play for Real Madrid, which was actually a scam", "found out he had a half-sister who plays for the U.S. Women's National Team", and "left his club to go to the MLS". He summed it up thusly: "It was an emotional afternoon for me!" with a wry shake of his head.

Tangential bit of hilarity: at one point Husband wandered through the room to watch for a few minutes, and when he emerged, he made a comment that I heard as: "Derek's very excited about the nude celebrations in this edition!" I'm sorry, WHAT was that? Derek clarified, "No, no, there are totally clothed, NEW celebrations." (Whew, that makes much more sense...)

Riley, on the other hand, received items related to ACTUAL soccer, such as a new ball. (So that he has an old one for the back yard, where there are rocks and sticks that sometimes cause damage, and a slightly better one to take to the Middle School field--but not TOO nice, because it's often wet and muddy there-- and finally, one that's in perfect condition, for official practices. Got all that? Pfft...boys...) One thing he didn't ask for, but I had a brilliant brainstorm and got him anyway, was a small indoor goal for our Bonus Room, where he and Derek--and whoever else happens to be visiting at any given moment--frequently kick a foam ball around. Now at least they have something to AIM for, besides the wall. I must have been on the right track, because after trying it out for a while, Riley declared that it contributed to this being "one of the Best. Christmases. EVER." (Yaaayy!)

Meanwhile, Husband, besides the aforementioned grill lighting device, was given stainless steel, insulated coffee mugs...because apparently, his morning java cools off too quickly when he takes it into his office to sip while working...and it was just wrecking his routine to have to stop what he's doing, get up, walk into the kitchen, and re-microwave it repeatedly. (Hey, whatever...steams your cuppa joe, dude....) Also, the requisite jumbo bag o'snacks that the boys and I always hand-pick from a local specialty shop--Old Bay spiced peanuts, onion flavored potato chips, sourdough pretzel bites, Doc Brown's Cherry soda...a plethora of quality junk food, in other words.

Then in the afternoon, we'd scheduled a family outing to see the latest Star Wars flick. We had a slew of logistical difficulties when trying to figure out when the heck we were going to squeeze this in, with the limited time available to us, Derek already having seen it, and Riley firmly announcing that he didn't want to go without his brother. But then we realized we hadn't considered Christmas day, causing Derek to note, "Well, Jewish people go to the movies on Christmas, right?" (Yep--and a whole lotta others as well, if the crowds were any indication--it turned out to be a popular choice for December 25th!)

On the way there, Husband, who had missed the previous installment, asked for a plot synopsis. Derek gamely attempted to summarize both the storyline and the major characters, but given the complexity of the material, he warned, "Just listen; don't ask any questions." And Husband managed to contain himself for approximately 2 sentences, before interrupting and demanding clarification or more details on this point or the other. Eventually Derek gave up in exasperation and said,  "You know what? Lots of explosions, lightsabers, good guy vs. bad guys, that's all you need to know!" (Seriously, he should have taken the high-tech route, and IMDBd it before we left, yeah? Amateur...)

To round out our excursion, since we'd left the theater just as the sun was setting, we did end up taking a circuitous route home, so we could get our fill of ogling other people's outdoor decorations. From the classy and understated, to the over-the-top electrical extravaganzas, we enjoyed viewing...and critiquing...the whole gamut. And with that, Christmas 2017 came to an end. It was a day chock-full of family and fun--so the best kind, really. And now, to all a good night!

Monday, December 25, 2017

Pre-Navidad, 2017

Whether we were ready or not, Christmas Eve arrived--and with it, one tradition that the boys and I keep: attending church together. This year, since the 24th actually fell on a Sunday, I gave them a choice of which service they'd prefer...and they surprised me by selecting our regular 11:15 slot, rather than the evening option. I didn't ask why, but I inferred that they liked the idea of having the rest of the day free for...I don't know, "boy shenanigans"....and whatnot. It also amused me that Derek asked, "Should we dress a little more formally for Christmas Eve?" I hadn't even considered that, but I agreed it seemed like a solid plan.

However, I totally forgot to follow up on it, which is why we set out for the whole "celebrating the birth of Jesus" event with Derek clad in one of his trademark clashing ensembles, consisting of green/grey athletic shorts, paired with a screaming crimson USCB Sand Sharks tee, all covered by a University of South Carolina hoodie. Sigh...at least the other one took the initiative to don his nice charcoal semi-fancy shorts...and Penn State shirt. But hey, I'm firmly of the opinion that God doesn't care how we look...just that we're present, and participating!

Although...I should probably add "and also paying attention", because when it came time for the closing song, which is always a candlelit Silent Night, the pastor gave specific instructions, "The candles that are already burning stay upright, while the next person in the row touches their unlit wick to the flame, and so on." Sounds extraordinarily efficient, safe, and simple, yeah? So what does Derek do? Immediately tilts his fiery, dripping candle over towards Riley, completely contrary to directions. (I swear, you really can't take them ANYWHERE...)

Anyway, it's fortunate that we get to hear some quality Christmas music sung and played by the very talented praise band at our church, because we've reached that point in the season when I've officially turned the corner on the radio's rotation of holiday tunes, and now turn them off as frequently as I actually listen to and enjoy them. Case in point: I've been heard lately to yell, "Aaarrrgh! Feliz Navi-DON'T!" as I punch the button to change the station. Or to I argue with my empty car, "Seriously, who decided that just because of the title, Last Christmas should be played at this time of year. Over. And. Over? And to the artists who keep remaking it? STOP, okay? (For the love of all things holy...)

So in my defiance, I'd been playing a Tchaikovsky CD while driving, instead...and when I turned it on after church, Riley facetiously commented, "Ooh, I love this song!" I scoffed in reply, "Do you even know what it IS?" This was mostly rhetorical, but he answered anyway, in an extremely uncertain tone "Um...the 1812 Overture!" I was about to concede that it was, in fact, a nice try, when Derek decided to take a stab in the dark and exclaimed, "No...it's The Nutcracker!"

Wow...well done! However, I decided to press my luck by asking, "Okay...which part?" With mock outrage, Derek sputtered, "Whattya mean? It's all just...The Nutcracker!" Unwilling go let him off the hook so easily, I prompted, "The most famous part of the whole composition....?" After a looooong pause, Derek responded, questioningly, "Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies?" Ding ding ding! Before I could be proud of his...minuscule knowledge of classical composers, Derek continued, "Yeah, about that...can someone explain to me why there are fairies in this thing?"

So I gamely began attempting to describe the plot...but quickly realized that--even having seen the stage version in person--somehow I don't really seem to have a grasp of the story. "Well, there's this girl, and...lots of dancing...and...I think the whole thing's a dream...maybe?" Derek interrupted, "Hold on--is the villain...a mouse?" I was relieved that he remembered that salient point, "YES! That's right, there are overgrown rodents...with swords, and they battle the Nutcracker, and...oh, I don't really know. But there's glorious music, and majestic ballet dancing."  'Nuff said, right? (In retrospect, it wasn't a terribly productive conversation, but it wasn't a lengthy trip, either, so it got us home...without having to suffer through any choral travesties sung by Chipmunks...)

Later in the evening, for a heartwarming family bonding experience, I proposed taking a jaunt around the Chapel Hill/Carrboro neighborhoods to admire all of the houses adorned for the merry December festivals 'o everything. This was vetoed by the oldest teenager, however, who for some reason protested leaving the house. Instead, he backed the alternative agenda: lounging on the couch and watching a classic DVD from our collection (on second thought, it's pretty clear why he'd vote for this no-energy-required activity). Derek even picked the show: Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

Alrighty, then, let's fire up the electronic device that we turn on exactly once a year! But first....let's try to remember which "input" we need to set for the TV. And change the batteries in the remote, since they're apparently no longer functioning. Okay! We're ready! Bring on the beloved childhood entertainment! Aaaannnnd the program did start...in SPANISH. What. The. WHAT?

Try as we might, we were utterly unable to make it switch back to our mother tongue...and while we found it somewhat funny-yet-exasperating to listen to the Burl Ives snowman narrate in rapid-fire Espanol, we agreed that the limited appeal was going to wear off for us in about 5 minutes. Therefore we eventually gave up, and moved on to the Backup Plan: A Muppet Family Christmas (which is secretly MY all-time fave, so...WIN! But I promise I didn't intentionally hijack the ridiculous DVD player! We're just keeping our fingers crossed that the rebellious reindeer behaves, the next time we try...)

Afterwards, chock full of the holiday spirit, or what have you, we attempted to convince Riley that there was still time to fit in the illuminated tour of the surrounding towns, but his instant, emphatic response was "Dude, I'm knackered!" Yep, too much British soccer--sorry, "football"--viewing, wouldn't you agree? (I suppose he's good for now, but if he starts referring to us as "blokes", I'll have to think about shutting it down...)

Finally, there was only one more thing to do before our "long Winter's nap"...of course, I'm talking about the charming process of "negotiating a wake-up-and-open-gifts" time. Now, when the boys were little, this involved stern warnings to NOT bother Mom and Dad before, say, 7 a.m. But these days it's more along the lines of "Derek, we WILL be dragging you out of your warm, cozy bed, the only question is "how early"?

Just to see what his reaction would be--and to crack myself up, I'm not gonna lie--I informed him that 8:00 sounded about right. He gaped at me, horrified and praying he'd heard me wrong. "What? WHY?" He couldn't imagine what was so important that we had to disturb his precious adolescent slumber: "C'mon, Dad asked for grill matches! And what did Riley even want, again?" His brother brightly interjected, "Well, I did tell Mom I needed a new foot-scrubber-thingie, since she threw mine out. I really hope there's one under the tree!" Not to be left out of the super-fun "torture Derek" moment, Husband tacked on, "Just think, Riley, maybe she got you a really special one, that hangs up in the shower, and everything!" Derek's threw up his hands in truly melodramatic fashion and barked, "Let me get this straight, you people are really gonna get me up early...for a loofah on a hook?"

Whew, that was a delightful interlude, I tell ya. Nothing quite says Christmas like giving the kids a hard time, amiright? This went on for a few more minutes, but after I'd gotten him to agree to a firm 9:15, I relented and assured him he could take his time and emerge from his hibernation at the customarily accepted 10:00. After all, this would afford me plenty of quiet time in the morning to sip my coffee while kicking back in front of ye olde tannenbaum with some carols...or maybe even give one more shot at sorting out our little scarlet-schnoz latino friend...Rudolpho. Peace out, and ho ho ho, y'all!

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

'Twas the week before Christmas (Already? Aaaarrrrghhhh!)

Hey, here's a question for you: does anyone else feel like they're careening through December like a...runaway Polar Express? I mean, it seems like I JUST gussied up the old homestead, like YESTERDAY, and suddenly it's less than a week 'til Christmas. Holy calendar crunch, Batman, how did that happen?

Well, at least there's lots of fun and festivities you can count on at this time of year to keep your spirit bright and your mood jolly. Like...finding the perfect present for your loved ones? Oh, wait...it was like pulling teeth to get ANY of the Male Trio to commit to asking for anything this year....so never mind about that. (Don't get me wrong, there are definite pluses to this, of course, the most obvious being 1) money saved and 2) shopping mall chaos avoided. So let's hear it for "Amazon.com in my pjs" All. Day. Long.) Also, I suppose I shouldn't reeeaaally give the guys a hard time, since it was difficult for ME to figure out a Wish List as well.

You see, I used to be completely off the hook, until the children reached an age when they have some of their own money to spend, and started wanting to be part of the gifting...which is lovely and heartwarming and all of that, no doubt...but does cause something of a dilemma. You know, because it's not reasonable to suggest what I truly desire....for instance, a trip to Europe. And it's impossible to provide what would be most helpful...such as a winning lottery ticket. Clearly, this is a problem...

Anyway, after wracking my brains, I finally did come up with an idea. However, when I attempted to describe the very simple object--a belt one wears while running, which securely holds keys and other necessary items--I only managed to get about 5 words in before Husband loudly interrupted, with an innocent expression and far too much enthusiasm, "OH! You mean a FANNY PACK!" Um...how shall I put this delicately...."NOOOOOO, that's not even close...since the last time I checked, it wasn't the 1990s anymore." I've gotta tell ya, I was not overcome with confidence in the abilities of my own personal Elf Squad, especially when--while I was still in the room, mind you, Husband lowered his voice ever-so-slightly and commented in a pseudo-aside to the kids, "Ha! What're the odds that we don't totally screw this up?" (Yeah...I'm thinking that the morning of the 25th could be...interesting...)

While we're on the subject, Husband wasn't any better, himself: the only item he initially mentioned was...extra-long matches, to light the grill. You see what I'm working with? It's not easy being the resident Mrs. Clause, my friends. (In case you're wondering, yes, the boys and I did fulfill his request...but we opted for a refillable lighter with an extended, skinny handle, made specifically for just such...meat-charring activities. I'm absolutely certain that he'll love it...his $4 treasure...)

And then there's our annual Holiday Open House. That's always a good one--gathering friends and family to chat, catch up on the latest haps, and congregate around a table filled with party snacks. However, this year I went a little overboard on the sweets end of the spectrum and ended up with LOTS of leftover treats. Therefore I sternly instructed the boys on Sunday night to "pack cookies to carry to school with you, and pass them out to your friends at lunchtime!" Riley took me so seriously that he even asked, "How many can I bring?" (My answer was something along the lines of "as many as you can carry...every day....until they're gone." And thank you, my Sugarplum Fairy...)

Unfortunately, Derek hasn't been able to participate in Operation...Dessert Distribution...because he evidently has been infected with some sort of...I don't know, plague-type deal. (And to his pal who kicked off this whole thing, and thus shall be called Patient Zero...you know who you are...thanks a bunch for sharing, buddy! No, no, I'm kidding--you all walk around in a veritable High School petri dish every day, and you're lucky to escape relatively unscathed most of the time. Oh, and...get well soon!) Anyway, Derek's hacking cough began over the weekend, prompting me by Sunday night to decree that he would not, in fact, be attending school the next day. (How sick did he feel? He wasn't even able to muster the tiniest spark of excitement about missing classes--he simply looked up blearily from where he was curled into a ball on the couch, half-watching SportsCenter, groaned, and mumbled in agreement. Now that's a pathetic picture yeah?)

When the coughing continued unabated on Monday, he was awarded a second day off...complete with a bonus doctor visit to check if it was anything that required a prescription. NOT a traditional part of the season--thank goodness--but these things happen. Now the rest of Team WestEnders is doing everything in our power to remain virus-free...fingers and toes crossed that the illness starts and ends with (poor) Derek!

Finally, to end on a much more positive note, my office had our annual outing--an opportunity to step away from our desks, go somewhere non-work-related, and celebrate...everything! This year we patronized the Carolina Inn (a Chapel Hill institution, located on UNC's campus) for their Royal Tea, which includes an impressive assortment of luscious finger foods and, of course, a selection of flavored brews to sip. In the ornate dining room decorated with a Twelve Days of Christmas theme, we were able to unwind, nosh, and enjoy conversations that had NOTHING to do with our jobs. (And it was late afternoon, when most of my colleagues would still have been plugging away at their computers, so it felt extra-decadent--Win!)

So that about wraps up the entertainment...and such...for this week. What? It's only TUESDAY? Jeez Louise, are you sure? Well then, I'd better get some rest, because who knows what the remainder of the pre-Noel period will bring. Hopefully fewer germs...less gooberheadedness (unlikely, but one can wistfully dream, right?)...some healthy meals to offset the inevitable candy canes...and lots more tea!

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Yo, Planet Dude--Settle Down, Will Ya?

I wouldn't consider myself a terribly superstitious person. Although I HAVE been known to "knock on wood" for luck...and if I'm describing the potential undesirable outcomes of an event, I frequently try to prevent them from happening by prefacing my comments with the disclaimer, "Now, I don't want to jinx it..." On the other hand, if a black cat crosses my path, I'm inclined to stop and pet it, rather than run in the opposite direction. Friday the 13th is just another day on the calendar. And let's face it--I've broken my share of mirrors over the years, with no noticeable ill effects. Heck, I don't even read my horoscope, or any other astrological...stuff (even though a part of me finds it absolutely fascinating--shhhh! That can just be our little secret, 'kay?).

You might be wondering where I'm going with this (which if you're being totally honest, you probably frequently do...as well you should...). Let me explain (although I'll warn you right here that it's gonna get...weird): when a character on NCIS: LA was experiencing various snafus in his personal life, he dramatically blamed it all on "Mercury being in retrograde". It was kind of hilarious at the time, BUT...shortly thereafter, it just so happened that my co-workers and I were standing around chatting, and the conversation morphed into a veritable litany of things that had been going wrong around the office in recent days. A lightbulb went off, and I shared the whole "Mercury in retrograde" theory with them. Then because I'm, you know,"me", I immediately went to my computer and looked it up. Whattya know, we were right smack in the middle of one of those phases.

Yeah, yeah--so what does this MEAN, exactly? Well, according to The Old Farmer's Almanac,

"Due to the way our own orbit interacts with those of the other planets, they might sometimes appear to be traveling backward through the night sky with respect to the zodiac. This is, in fact, an illusion, which we call apparent retrograde motion.
Several times a year, it appears as if Mercury is going backwards. These times in particular were traditionally associated with confusions, delay, and frustration.
The planet Mercury rules communication, travel, contracts, automobiles, and such. So, when Mercury is retrograde, remain flexible, allow time for extra travel, and avoid signing contracts. Review projects and plans at these times, but wait until Mercury is direct again to make any final decisions."

Whoa...if you were inclined to accept such a....celestial explanation...it wouldn't be much of a stretch to fit all of our misadventures neatly into this excuse--er "framework". Somewhat surprisingly, all of my super-scientific colleagues were ready to jump on the bandwagon right along with me. Perhaps it just felt reassuring to have some kind of reason--however flimsy--for the ever-growing pile of "things that didn't go as planned". 

Therefore I cheerfully printed out the dates that good old Mercury would be spinning out of control, as it were, so we could have a good chuckle together...and also be prepared to pin misfortune on our fiery planetary neighbor, if need be. Aaaaannnnd, you guessed it: the Big M is up to its tricks again, from December 3rd to 23rd. Just how much did we (jokingly...mostly) buy into this spiel? I'll tell ya...one of my office mates was experiencing a slew of mishaps in the week leading up to turned-around-Mercury, so together we decided it was an anticipatory period (Ha! Pun definitely intended) that shall hereafter be known as...PMR...for Pre Mercury in Retrograde. (Get it? Like PMS, but for huge, interstellar hunks of rock! Yeah, sorry about that...)

So how's it going, in this current 3-week spell of imaginary atmospheric upheaval? Ahem...let's just say that for me, personally, the manifestations seem to be centered in the realm of "technology"...which has become distinctly...uncooperative (also see "obnoxious" and "belligerent"). For example, Microsoft Office programs suddenly chose to cease operating on the household laptop. (Okay, it's coming up on 6 years old, but still, the timing was distinctly suspicious, don't you think? Just go with it...) "Fine!" I huffed, after struggling unsuccessfully for a while to resolve the issue, "I'll just use Word on MY laptop!" (With the implied, "So there, stupid machine!") And that would have been a brilliant and effective work-around...except that my computer had also evidently come to the conclusion that it wasn't interested in communicating with the wireless printer anymore, thankyouverymuch. 

Ay yi yi...I did get these two problem sorted out--by removing and reinstalling the offending software in both cases, if you're interested. (And keeping my fingers firmly crossed--ooh, there's another good one!--that they continue to grace me with obedience...at least until the new laptop I went ahead and ordered arrives...) Then I figured I'd more than earned a quiet, restful interlude. Ooh, you know what would be really nice? Curling up with a novel! Hey, I think I'll download something on my Kindle! Suuurre...if only the *&%$# thing would actually STAY ON when I press the power button. This was beginning to cross the line into "ridiculous", am I right? (Connecting the e-reader to its cord and an electrical socket seemed to reboot its brain and convince it to behave...although I confess I have no earthly idea why....)

Let's see, what's next...oh, yes: on Tuesday my cell phone refused to dial, until I finally turned it off and back on after the 4th attempt to place a call. And finally, bringing us up to date is my work-PC, which informed me with a full-screen yellow and red error message that it would NOT, in fact, be helping me to access the company's Intranet site...at all(An overly emphatic notification that frankly, just felt like the pain-in-the-butt gadget was unnecessarily rubbing it in...)

Oh. Good. Grief. At this point, I'd had E-N-O-U-G-H, and I was no longer messing around--so I went above its head immediately, and tattled to our IT department. A technician handled it in, oh, about 30 seconds...which was super-helpful, to be sure...but also completely worrisome. Because I now am forced to admit that--besides the hot-tempered heavenly body in question...or some perfectly rational explanation which we won't even deign to consider--the only thing all of these minor calamities have in common...is ME. 

Nah, we're gonna go ahead and keep maligning the stratospheric disruption of our pal Mercury...which also gives us one more excellent motivation to wait with bated breath for Christmas Eve to arrive! Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll step away from the screen (thanks for functioning flawlessly tonight, BTW), go pick up a paper-and-ink book, and commence non-automated relaxation...wish me luck (Salt over the left shoulder--go!)

Friday, December 8, 2017

Holiday Hijinks

With the halls having been decked during Thanksgiving weekend, only one thing remained, to complete the festive atmosphere in Casa WestEnders: the heartwarming family bonding activity known as "assembling, illuminating, and adorning the Christmas tree". We have an artificial version (which may not fill the house with a pine-fresh aroma....but also doesn't cause me a sinus infection, so if I feel deprived, I'll just light a fir-scented candle, and enjoy it without sneezing...or antibiotics...) and I leave the unpacking and constructing phase to the Male Trio. (Not to be sexist or anything...simply because frankly...I don't waaaaaanna!)

Then Husband adds the twinkly lights--and here we hit a small snag this year. You see, I thought I remembered that one of our strands had failed to work properly last year, meaning that Husband had to st-r-e-t-ch the remaining ones to cover all of the boughs without leaving any sad, unlit spaces. So I bought another string a few days before we planned to decorate--and congratulated myself on my memory, foresight, and proactive handling of the situation, to avert a potential holiday crisis (or what have you).

However...apparently I'm not terribly...um...shall we say "observant"...since I failed to notice that all of the other LEDs currently gracing our faux evergreen are white...yet I purchased the multicolored variety. Oops! Too late to do anything about it, so I shushed the little voice in my head going, "But...but...they don't MATCH! It looks weird! Do. It. Over!!" and decided that--for 2017, anyway--we were just going to embrace a little bit of...diversity...in our yuletide decor.

Yep, it works!
Next all of the ornaments are lovingly placed on the branches by my cooperative band of seasonal assistants...hahahahaha! Let's see...Husband skedaddled after finishing his electrical contribution, since he was coming down with a migraine and needed to go close himself up in a dark, quiet room (i.e.: NOT where the elf-ish shenanigans would be continuing). Derek draped himself across a couch and lay there half-comatose, semi-watching the proceedings, yawning frequently, and occasionally mumbling something about "getting up in a second to help". Soooo, that left Riley and me to tackle the bulk of the fa la la-ing...which we managed to thoroughly enjoy, nonetheless.

And then, once all of the special baubles had been arranged to my satisfaction, we arrived at the last very important task: rounding up the resident goofballs for the annual December Photo Shoot. One never knows what to expect from this endeavor...except that it inevitably will take twice as long as I think it should...and that there will be multiple moments of unbridled silliness. But first, due to the fact that I only use the self-timer function on my camera once a year, for this moment, I always need to skim the instructions and take a test shot or two, to make sure I know what I'm doing BEFORE calling in all of the guys. (Practice pic: check...)

Moving on...because I'm evidently a total glutton for punishment, I decided I wanted the boys to pose together in front of the tree, like I used to have them do when they were wee tots. You know, when they were young and wriggly and had the attention span of a flea, but I could strike a bargain with them by allowing candy canes during the proceedings, and thus get an angelic depiction of my sweet children. See? Absolutely precious, right?



Yeaaaahhh...now they're beyond the "bribing with treats" phase...and therefore much more difficult to coerce into behaving (which I realize sounds ridiculous, given that they're both in HIGH SCHOOL, for crying out loud, but there you have it...). So it went more along the lines of, "Okay, stand in front of the tree. Closer together. In the center. THE CENTER! Now look at me. Stop grimacing. Look at the camera. AT THE CAMERA! Quit laughing--this isn't supposed to be funny. Stop talking. Stay where you are--your eyes were closed, we're taking it again. Now hold still. You blinked AGAIN. One more time. Dude, seriously, could you possibly Keep. Your. Eyes. OPEN?" It was freakin' magical, I tell ya. Derek finally figured out that if he doesn't stare directly at the flash, he has an outside chance of succeeding at the open-eyed look. So mostly we have captured Riley, trying his darndest not to collapse on the floor in helpless giggles, and Derek, gazing off into the distance mysteriously. Siiiighhhhh....bless their pea pickin' hearts....


1
2
All of this nonsense was before we even attempted to do the portrait of the whole clan--the one that might, with any luck, be worthy of using on a greeting card to be sent out to extended family and dear friends. (I know, I know, I'm a hopeless optimist...) And how did this carefully orchestrated session of photographic creation go? Well...first there was the usual "Rats--not quite ready" mistake (1). And the "slightly misaligned" version (2). Oh, and let's not forget the "Riley made some wise-ass comment that cracked his brother up, causing Derek to SNORT into my HAIR iteratioin (3).


3
But none of these even came close to the one that happened after the following conversation. (Disclaimer: I'm not even sure what prompted it, so don't ask me!)

Derek: "I'm wearing Nike, how about you, Riley?"
Riley: "Mmm...(checks his shirt to make sure) Adidas!"
4
There's a slight pause as they're lining up and preparing for the shot, at which point Husband breaks into the silence with the enthusiastic exclamation, "I've got...Dickies!" (while waving one foot vigorously in the air, to demonstrate that his socks are, in fact, made by that unfortunately named company). The response was...well, there's no group picture to illustrate it, because the beloved offspring pretty much fell onto the nearest piece of furniture, holding their stomachs, overcome with hysterical laughter (4).

It should come as no surprise that this was immediately followed by me yelling "That's it! Next year, I'm RENTING A NEW FAMILY for the holiday photo!" I was kidding...eh, at least partially. Finally, at looooong last, we achieved a decent representation of Team WestEnders, 2017 (5). I tell ya, it was like...a Christmas miracle. Aaaannnnd, not wanting to press my luck any further, I promptly dismissed them. (I believe my exact words were, "We're done here! Now go away!") Whew...pictures done, cards ordered--someone get me a hot chocolate...and don't skimp on the whipped cream, 'cuz I earned it this year, y'all!

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Because ya gotta have goals...

The Team WestEnders 2017 slate of 5Ks  officially concluded this afternoon--with the only event that  all four of us actually managed to attend together this year, incidentally! As our resident Race Coordinator (a title that I've just now arbitrarily bestowed upon myself...and which I also decree totally deserves a cute new pair of workout shoes, yeah? You know, for all the...Runner....Wrangling service I provide...or what have you...) I selected 7 from our area--Husband and Derek each participated in 2, Riley managed 3...and of course I did the whole kit and caboodle (knee crankiness, cortisone injections, and physical therapy notwithstanding...). So, here's how it broke down:

The activities kicked off in February, with the Run for the Roses in Raleigh. Some members of the outdoor bootcamp group I belong to have made this an annual tradition, so I went along to see what it was like. I usually opt to stick closer to home, to reduce the amount of "crawling out of bed at the crack of dawn...ish...and driving somewhere...to RUN", but since this one always happens in the...let's call it "Quasi-Winter"...the start time is set for afternoon, presumably to allow it to heat up to a comfortable temperature after the overnight low. This year, however, race day weather was freakishly warm--we're talking 80*, out of the blue--which made for a difficult slog...on what I also discovered was a very hilly course. Long story short: not my fave, but it was kind of exciting to be able to do a 5K so early in the new year.

Next up: the 5K for Education, which Riley and I have now done 3 times together, since moving to Chapel Hill. In fact, when I asked the fam if anyone else wanted to join us...and they declined...Riley replied, "It's kind of 'our thing', Mom." Well, alrighty, then! It was a damp, chilly morning in March, but regardless of what's going on in the atmosphere, we enjoy the route, because it's one of those that begins and ends on UNC's campus, and winds its way through the town of Chapel Hill a little bit as well. (So it does have some elevation to deal with...but at least it's also scenic...)

In May, the kids and I repeated our showing in the DNA Day 5K, another run that winds its way in and around UNC...and includes shirts that boldly proclaim on the back, above the sponsors "Run for Science!" Now I ask you, who wouldn't love that kind of...nerdy swag? It wasn't much of a surprise when the zippy Riley finished in the top 3 for his age group, and was awarded a medal, along with a cool commemorative glass. Although as we were standing around congratulating him, it WAS a shock to hear my own name called, for the...ahem...let's say "middle-aged ladies" category. As I retrieved my set of prizes, I couldn't help but think, "There must not have been any other women my age running this time!" (Didn't stop me from making off with the goods, though!)

Then, when looking around online for the next race opportunity, I stumbled across a new one happening in June, called...the VegFest 5K. Obviously, there was no question whatsoever that I NEEDED to take part in a run that celebrated fresh produce in the title. What was unusual is that Husband readily agreed to sign on with me. The boys...not so much. I believe I got as far as "Veg..." before Derek brusquely cut me off by loudly proclaiming his boycott of anything having to do with "running for vegetables". If I remember correctly, the word "hippie" was used disparagingly to describe the activity as well. Whatever--Husband and I thought it was a cute concept...unfortunately, the event's maiden voyage, if you will, wasn't terribly well-organized or executed, so we're reserving judgment on whether we'll give it another chance next year.

During the height of Summer there came a long lull for us, as nothing really matched our schedule, location, or length preferences. Which brings us to a couple of races that I ended up doing solo--well, me and hundreds of other outdoor enthusiasts, I mean. The Fall version of the Blue Blood Rivalry Run gathers folks who support UNC...or the D-school...and sends them out to compete against each other on foot, the same day the football teams clash on the field. It makes for a lively, good-natured environment, on a path that turned out to be uncharacteristically gentle and easy, for Chapel Hill. (Yay!) Then on Thanksgiving I decided to switch from the 8K I've done the past 2 years in Carrboro, to a shorter turkey trot in Durham. Aaaannnd, even though it was quite a chilly endeavor, the route proved to be another relatively flat--and therefore fast--undertaking.

That, of course, brings us to today's Grand Finale: the 2nd occurrence of the Positive Impact for Kids 5K, which benefits Duke's and  UNC's children's hospitals, through a charity founded by a local High School student. It was another afternoon affair, at a familiar park, and we'd all done it last year, so it seemed an excellent way for us to tie a festive bow on the 2017 race season...with vigorous exercise...and family bonding...and whatnot. In truth, while Riley immediately agreed to the plan, Derek's response was something more along the lines of, "Ugh. You're gonna MAKE me run, aren't you? Do I even have a choice?" (Hmm, let me think about that...why no, you don't! So may I politely request that you get out there and jog a couple of times, to at least pretend you trained, before you show up your parents with the effortless stamina and speed of youth? Thanks...) Then Riley's soccer coach went and did something crazy, like coordinate a scrimmage with another club...for the same day. Yet the 14 year-old with boundless energy shrugged and said, "Eh, it's fine. I should still be able to do it after my game."

And you know what? Not only did he run it...he finished 3rd overall, 2nd in the Male division. (That's after 80 minutes of sprinting and kicking and...stuff. Seriously, it's exhausting to me just imagining it...) For his efforts--and because I insisted we stay for the awards part, when the impatient teenagers wanted to rush home, plop down in front of the TV, and start watching football--he was presented with a nifty pair of athletic socks...and a $25 gift certificate to Fleet Feet. (SEE? Mother. Knows. Best!) Derek and Husband naturally came in waaaaayyy ahead of me, but I had nothing to complain about--even though I felt like I was chugging up the inclines, having advance knowledge of the surroundings apparently helped, as I was able to record a PR for this particular trail.

And with that, my friends, we're gonna call this....the final (racing) Win of 2017. Now it's time for a well-earned hiatus...for researching the next group of challenges we'd like to try in 2018. But for a while, the only thing we're going to be hustling for...is the holiday cookies! Mmmmm.....

Monday, November 27, 2017

A Time-Traveling Holiday Excursion

To paraphrase an old saying, "When the boys are away, the girl will...pick a  new destination to explore, grab her camera, hop in the car, and...go play". So for this year's Friday Field Trip: Thanksgiving Edition, I selected Fayetteville, NC. According to my extensive research--um..."5 seconds of Googling"--the town would be hosting A Dickens Holiday, with the historic area blocked off to vehicle traffic to allow craft booths, horse-drawn carriage rides, strolling Victorian-costumed characters, and period-themed street performers. Throw in a nearby nature center where I'd be able to enjoy the fabulous Fall weather and scenery, and it began to add up to my kinda gig.  

Thus, armed with the aforementioned photographic equipment, and a handful of healthy snacks (which later on would turn out to be utterly lifesaving, as you'll see) I hit the road for the 75-ish mile, almost-due-south jaunt. I had my heart set on stopping somewhere in the first couple of minutes to obtain some of that restorative elixir known as Peppermint Mocha, from the magical realm of...the Celestial Stags (Get it? Star...bucks? Sorry, I couldn't resist...I'm cracking myself up, here...) but alas, this was not meant to be. 

You see, I'd forgotten one very crucial fact: once you leave the protective circle of Chapel Hill, there are vast, wild swaths of North Carolina that contain...a whole lotta NOTHING. In case you don't believe me, or think I'm exaggerating (plasters on her most innocent expression: MoiPerish the thought!), how's this for evidence: apparently, folks in the rural regions must be satisfied picking up their java from...gas stations! (I KNOW, right? Shudder! Also, I might be a bigger coffee snob than I previously admitted. Eh, I'm comfortable with that...)

Other than that little hiccup, it was a peaceful, scenic--albeit super-flat--drive through acres of pine trees and a couple of small 'burbs along the way, breaking up the monotony. My first stop was the Cape Fear Botanical Garden, which--even this late in the year--offered an oasis of brilliant colors along its tranquil, winding paths. With an abundance of Autumn foliage bravely clinging to the bushes and trees...strategically placed overlooks for viewing the lazy Cape Fear River...adorable gazebos tucked into forest nooks, patiently waiting to be stumbled upon and admired...and a delightfully reflective pond in the middle of all the flora and fauna....it provided several hours of soul-satisfying communing with the Great Outdoors. 

Then it was time to rejoin civilization, and see how Fayetteville was decked out for its throwback reimagining of the Yuletide season. The first thing I encountered after pulling into my "Free All Day" parking spot along a side street (Score!) instantly set the tone for my excursion: one of the advertised carriages, decked out for the holiday, loaded with visitors, and pulled by an enormous workhorse. Okay, I'm in the proper mood--let's do this! I wandered into the fray and was struck first by the juxtaposition of the old and new elements on display. The stores and restaurants that line the street were open for business as usual, for example...but while you stood window shopping, Bob Cratchit and Tiny Tim might just pass by, amiably waving to the crowd and posing for pictures at tourists' requests. 

Smartly dressed police officers occasionally blew their silver whistles to clear the road when the intrepid riders on towering, 3-wheeled bicycles needed to pass. Or you might hear a loud clanking and moaning, and turn to see the ghost of Jacob Marley stalking down the sidewalk. When I needed a short respite from the exhausting business of popping in and out of boutiques and floating from one booth of unique handmade items to the next, I stopped to listen to the choral or instrumental groups, who set a festive mood while filling the air with the lilting strains of traditional carols. 

It was altogether entertaining and charming, and I ambled up and down the main drag for several hours before finally making the one very important choice of the day: which ornament to purchase for the Team WestEnders Christmas tree. By this time I was approaching the dangerous red zone of "famished: feed immediately or risk unpleasant consequences"; however, there weren't really any viable food options for me at this shindig, unfortunately. That's where the protein bar I'd packed that morning came in handy--allowing me to stave off the worst of the low-blood-sugar effects for a while longer. At that point, though, I'd also been walking around for hours and hours, and while I'd originally planned to stick around for the candlelight parade at 5, I reversed course and opted to start the commute back home. 

Besides, my celebratory 19th-century interlude had infused me with the proper inspiration to continue the spirit at my own house. I mean, since it was the day after Thanksgiving, I could now follow the example my mother set for me all those years ago--by cranking up the holiday tunes, and unpacking ALL the Christmas decorations to merrily deck the halls. Fa la la la la, la la la la...y'all!

Friday, November 24, 2017

Keeping it non-traditional...ish...

Aah, Thanksgiving...not only a glorious holiday itself, but also the moment that kicks off the whole upcoming season of fa la la festivity and fun. Plus, as if you needed any more reason to cherish it: an entire day dedicated to eating ALL of the good things. (And gratitude for the blessings in your life...and spending time with loved ones, of course...oh, and gridiron action, for some...but you get my point, yeah? Super--let's move on then...)

As is their custom, the Male Trio took to the highway on Wednesday for their annual Turkey Day sojourn to South Carolina to visit Husband's parents. The kids look forward to chowing down on copious amounts of scrumptious standards, prepared by their loving Mimi (without having to worry about their mother's gluten-free or vegetarian influence--ha!). Other than that, they plan to engage in a little bit of outdoor fun (just to, you know, avoid sinking too deeply into a carb coma from all of the rich dishes they're unaccustomed to enjoying), and a whole lotta relaxing. Yep, just about the only thing they had to think about before leaving...was the timing of their return. This involved some planning and discussion to settle the logistics, as it turned out, since (as I'm told) college football's Rivalry Week games happen this Saturday, and they don't want to miss too much while in transit.

Thus I arrived home from the office on Wednesday to a blissfully quiet house, and commenced my own long weekend o'chilling. Um...right...except for the fact that--once again--I'd signed up for a 5K on Thanksgiving morning, and therefore would be setting an alarm for 7, dragging myself out of bed, driving to the event, and RUNNING several miles before breakfast. (Seriously? At 3 years in a row, I guess this has officially become "a thing" for me. Not entirely sure how that happened...but let's just call it "Earning the Big Meal", okay?)

This year I switched venues, however, from the 8K that happens a few miles from my house to a shorter race in (still nearby) Durham (because...I took a survey, and my knees loudly weighed in with the opinion that 5 miles just seemed a bit...excessive...at this point, ya know?). So after a brief debate about how much to wear--because trust me, it was cooooold this morning, y'all--I made my way over to our friendly neighbor, the Bull City. I suffered a jolt of mild panic in the car when I realized I'd forgotten to factor in traffic...or parking....but I needn't have worried, because the local roads at that hour of the a.m. reminded me of the emptiness of a post-apocalyptic landscape (but without the massive destruction...nuclear clouds...or hordes or rampaging zombies. Otherwise, JUST the same...).


So, having successfully arrived in even less time than I'd allowed for the trip, I actually had extra minutes to hang out...and feel my fingers freezing up, one by one. (Yaaayyyy....NOT...) But I also got to look around and admire the usual adornments that people break out for Thanksgiving day runs--like stuffed turkey hats (of both kinds: the one that's ready for the oven, and the one with a beak and feathers...yep, imagine those on people's heads...it's awesome, I tell ya....), Fall-colored tutus, and my absolute favorite, these socks:
(YESSSSS...that's exactly why we're here! Memo to Me: if I'm gonna keep doing this running-on-Thanksgiving gig, I neeeeed these for next year! What? It's motivation...or whatever...)

Anyway, I was joined by a work friend and a Boot Camp buddy, so that helped to pass some of the shivery pre-exercise time. And then it was finally time to gooooooo. This was the first time I'd done this particular course, and--happily--I found it to be fairly flat...and therefore fast, as well. I mean, that's really the only way to explain how I recorded my best time ever for a 5K...although the temperature provided an extra push, to be sure. Honestly, the only negative thing I can say about my experience is that they had a DJ set up near the beginning of the route, to presumably provide encouragement as you got started, but unfortunately when I happened to pass by, the song blaring out of his speakers was...Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer. (Are you kidding me? Of all the potential musical numbers available to you, from classics sung by beloved crooners to traditional carols to modern-pop-holiday-themed fluff, THIS is what you deemed an appropriate and enjoyable selection with which to serenade the stampeding pack? Sheesh...)

And that, my dears, is how one can...pre-pay...for the subsequent leisure hours of Macy's parade viewing, novel reading, Facebook scrolling to appreciate the celebrations of friends and family, and, of course...munching on the FEAST (which as usual consists of my 3 absolute favorite parts of the Thanksgiving repast: stuffing, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie...mmmmm....). Without further ado, it's now time to go stuff...ME! And tomorrow...I get to sleep in--whoo hoo! Aaaannnnd, let the holiday hoopla continue!

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Gamecocks...for the win!

Have you ever felt, at certain points in your life, that there seems to be a fifth season added to the year? For example, around the time when you and perhaps many of your friends are getting married, it could be considered Wedding Season...and then for those who choose to add to their families, it's a natural progression to Baby Shower Season. Well, when you're a High School Senior--or the parent of one--you may find yourself mired in the challenging period known as College Application Season.

At least it doesn't sneak up on you, since the timeframe is pretty predictable, depending on whether you opt to submit your materials for the Early Action or Regular Decision deadline. That is, of course, if your parent actually allows you to make this determination for yourself...or decrees that you WILL be completing all of the applications by the first possible date, in order to get them out of the way. (Raises hand..."Guilty as charged, your honor....and not even the slightest bit remorseful"...) In my defense, you might recall that in preparation for all of this...stuff...I attended many presentations at Derek's High School, hoping to gather tips and advice from the wise minds of the Guidance Counselors. Among all of the piles of useful information, one comment in particular stuck out to me, for whatever reason: "Preparing college applications is like having a whole other class in their schedule, based on the amount of time and effort it involves." So...yeah...YIKES.

Therefore, in order to not have this onerous task hanging over Derek's head for the entire first semester of his Senior year, I forced--ahem "strongly encouraged"--him to use the October and November dates as his goal. ('Cuz, let's face it, "I just LOVE spending every minute of my free time doing college apps!" said no one, E-V-E-R...) So the Carolinas went first (UNC, USC) on October 14th (that would be all of "one day early", in case you're scoring at home), followed by JMU and UNC Charlotte (due October 30th but sent on the 19th. Yes, he learned his lesson from the first mad scramble, thank goodness.). The final batch has a November 30/December 1 deadline, and includes Clemson, Penn State (both finalized on 11/7, by the way), and Virginia Tech (which we're planning to send by the Sunday night). Aaaannnnnd...that's it!

The point is, once you get the confirmation email that all of your required items have been received, you can relax, knowing that you've done what you can, but now it's out of your hands and the responsibility for your future has shifted to the Admissions Committee. (Okay, when I put it that way, it sounds a LOT less calm and peaceful...but once again, Derek's low-stress personality will see him through this with nary a worry, as usual...lucky duck...)

Next, of course, you begin the lengthy process of Waiting to Hear. Another advantage to the Early Action, of course, is that the notifications are supposed to occur sometime in January, thus ending the suspense of "Did I get in?" and kicking off the process of "Hmm, where am I going?" So we congratulated Derek on getting the job done, and mentally prepared ourselves for a looooong period of radio silence (because, you know, patience is SUCH a strong personality trait of mine...hahahahaha! Yeeeaaaah, I just kind of resigned myself to the fact that this whole thing would slowly drive me toward the Loony Bin...but what can ya do?)

But despite my best attempts, I just couldn't stop myself from thinking about it, every day when I opened the mailbox. (Yes, even though some institutions already informed us that they've converted entirely to electronic communications, old habits die hard, it seems...) From way back in my own pre-college days, I recalled that a large flat package means good news, while a business-size envelope indicates a polite form letter of dream-crushing denial (or whatever...). So one day (that would be "November 7th", specifically) I saw one of the former types, underneath a stack of the typical daily junk mail we receive. It was addressed to Derek, and it was from USC.

I flashed back to a recent conversation I'd had with one of my co-workers, who laughingly told the story of how her own parents had ripped open her first college letter before she got home from school, because they just couldn't stand the anticipation (and also, they claimed that they wanted to be able to share any bad news with her themselves, thereby cushioning the blow). Firmly, I resolved to NOT be that mother...nope, I could tough it out for (checks phone for time) 2 hours until Derek returned. However, as it turned out, I needn't have wasted my determination, since when I flipped the envelope over to the back, this is what leaped out at me:

Well, thanks so much for that LOL moment, South Carolina! And also, of course, I appreciate the kindness of sparing both prospective student and nervous-for-their-child parent that moment of dread before they rip open the flap to get to the fateful sheet of paper inside. Since I didn't have to manage that particular emotion, I had plenty of time for the others that welled up--excitement and pride for Derek, on the occasion of his very first acceptance to a university (and one that he considers a top choice for him, at that...so Bonus Yay)...along with just a wee bit of...let's say "mistiness". I mean, this just got waaaayyyy real, y'all. And I thought I had already steeled myself for it, but when it actually happened, maybe...not so much. (It WAS 2 months ahead of the schedule we'd had in our minds, so maybe that can be my excuse. Yep, we're totally gonna go with that...)

After barging into his office and waving the envelope in front of Husband (who was on a conference call at the time, but events like this are what Mute is made for, right?) I texted a photo to Derek, which he'd see the next time he checked his phone, probably (hopefully) between classes. (Meaning: not in the middle of a lecture, which I would never encourage...except in the most extreme situation...such as this one. Oh, go ahead, have the Principal call me--I'll take the rap!) In an hour or so, he replied with this question: "Did I get accepted" (Also note the missing punctuation, and if you're a..."mature adult"...who's also a card-carrying member of the Grammar Police, say it with me: "Grrrrr!").

I admit that I was perplexed here for a minute, folks. I glanced back and forth between the phone screen, and envelope's blaring proclamation, and I wondered for a brief, terrifying heartbeat if I'd somehow misinterpreted the message. But then I re-read the words "Open, Celebrate, Post #UofSCYes" and realized that it was just my goofball son, having his own Senior Moment (of the adolescent variety--yes, it's a thing, TRUST me...). I typed in "That's what the ginormous YES means, dude", restraining myself from conveying what I was really thinking, which was something along the lines of "And I'll be sure NOT to tell them that the student they offered a spot in their Freshman class of 2018 failed to understand his own admission packet....siiiighhhhhh...

Then--get this--Derek stayed at a friend's house--as he does almost every day after school--and played football until it got dark, rather than rushing home to see his Extremely Exciting Correspondence....and in the process, delayed the ceremonial Big Reveal of the contents for the rest of his dying-of-curiosity family as well. (Seriously? Sometimes this kid is sooooooo NOT like his mother at ALL...) So, yeah, that sums up our first experience with actually getting a positive response from one of his schools. Just think, 1 down, 6 to go...and 8 more weeks of thumb-twiddling. At least now we've got one of those other seasons coming up soon to provide a plethora of delightful distraction for much of that time...that's right, let's hear it for...the Holidays! We've got cheerful decorations, festive carols, delicious food, fun parties, and surprise gifts to look forward to...and no paperwork...or deadlines! Whoo hoo! Bring it on!

(And if a couple more of those universities wanted to, oh, I don't know...check something off their own To Do List...by sending Derek expedited notice of his status, that would be a super-special-present for Team WestEnders...just sayin'!)

Monday, November 13, 2017

When you take suggestions from the Peanut Gallery...

To continue with our second day in Charlotte: when initially planning our adventure, I'd purposely booked a hotel that was conveniently located about 2 miles from the university we were visiting--figuring that not only would this give us a central HQ from which to base our other activities, but it also would afford a realistic glimpse into how quick and easy traveling into the city would be, for students living on or around campus. And I'd have to say it worked out well for both of those goals...with the added benefit that we were able to familiarize ourselves a little bit with the area immediately surrounding UNCC...including one enormous, instantly-visible-for-miles, iconic establishment that the boys had heretofore never laid eyes on, much less entered...I'm talking about Ikea, folks.

That's right, when we lived in Maryland, the closest one was in College Park, about 30 minutes or so away, in a direction we never needed to go for anything else. (And very close to the University of Maryland--coincidence? Nope, I think they're very strategic when choosing where to build one of those things--what with college students being the ultimate customers for affordable items with which to furnish their dorm rooms or apartments...and also notorious impulse buyers!) So when we passed the building on one of our initial forays into Charlotte, Derek mused, "Hmm, I've never been to an Ikea. I kinda feel like I want to see it. Can we stop by before we leave to go back home?"

"Um...that's kind of an unusual request, coming from you, but sure, honey, why not?" (I blithely replied, with no earthly idea what I was getting myself into...) Thus on Saturday morning, after checking out of our hotel and thinking we were heading downtown, the sight of the blue-and-yellow monstrosity reminded us of our agreement...fortunately in time to veer into the turn lane and detour into the parking lot. As we pulled in, both boys admitted (with no small amount of amusement) that they were somewhat excited by their upcoming...consumer initiation of sorts. Then we strolled into the lobby and took the escalator to the second-floor showroom...where the boys' mouths dropped open in astonishment as they faced the acres of artfully-arranged, endlessly-varied merchandise.

While they gawked, speechless, I took advantage of the momentary lull to address other pressing matters--namely that the hotel coffee had proven decidedly sub-par, and I wished to pick up a fresh hot cup of java at the cafe before commencing the...shopping-palooza. The boys nodded distractedly and waved me off, before following the magnetic pull of the...Swedish Wonderland...and meandering into the retail mecca. I joined them just a few moments later, having procured a mug o'delight...FREE before 10 a.m., by the way. (And I'd been totally willing to pay the buck they normally charge, so...Double Bonus!)

The teenagers started off slowly, wandering among the furniture and household items, but rapidly picked up steam and began scheming together. "This [armchair] would be great in our Game Room!" "Ooh, imagine if we had this [sectional sofa]? I'd never get up from playing FIFA '18!" I just trailed slightly behind them, listening to their excited chatter and shaking my head in bemusement. Who were these young men...and what the heck happened to MY shopping-averse children?

It got even more hilarious when they entered the kitchen section...and began critiquing the finishes, for crying out loud. For example, Riley commented, "I don't really like the colors in here. I would have gone with something lighter, to make it look bigger." Oh. Good. Grief. I swear, it's like I'm stuck in the middle of an episode of....Adolescent HGTV, here. (Meanwhile, I listened attentively and nodded thoughtfully...while keeping my face neutral and cracking up inside...it was pretty tough, I tell ya...)

Next they kicked off the inevitable process of holding up random, ridiculous stuff...and (mostly jokingly) asking me if we could buy it. "Can we have this [plush] soccer ball?" "Ooh, look at this fake plant! We should absolutely get it!" Or my favorite: "Mooommmm, we really NEED this...stuffed cactus!" At some point it became clear that they'd become completely...assimilated...when Derek actually uttered the words, "I mean, I feel like we'd be LOSING money if we left here without buying anything, am I right?" (He was kidding...at least partially...)

And whattya know...we stumbled upon something that truly did warrant a purchase (drumroll): a laundry hamper. You see, we'd literally just discussed this topic in the car on Friday--i.e., how it's long overdue for the boys to start handling their own dirty clothes, rather than Husband and I just chucking them in with ours like we've always done. So there we stood, amongst all the selections, conducting a surreal conversation on the relative merits of each container. (You know, capacity, durability, presence of handles for easy transport up and down the stairs, and finally...preferred color. No, I'm not making that up...)

After much consideration, we made our final choice...and having dawdled away an almost incomprehensible 90 minutes in this place, broke for the checkout line before we could do any further damage. Except for one teensy, tiny loss of concentration as we neared the registers...when Derek grabbed a bottle of sparkling apple cider, assuming I'd shoot him down without even giving it a moment's thought, and I shocked him by agreeing to add it to our bargains. (The only defense I can offer is that I'd passed the point of overstimulation and crossed into downright giddiness somewhere after the first hour...and I have the $2.99 fake booze to show for it...ha!) So that's how we finalized our Ikea trip: with a bill that came to...$11.78. (I'd throw in a dramatic "Curse you, Ikea!", but seriously, what are the odds that one gets out of that warehouse for under 12 bucks? Yeah, I'm gonna take the W...and RUN toward the exit...)

After that experience--which left us still laughing as we escaped to the car--we made a beeline for Freedom Park, a charming swath of nature tucked into the heart of Charlotte, where we enjoyed some crisp Autumn air as we circled the small lake in its center. I'd promised Derek that I'd try to show him some of Charlotte's other neighborhoods, so by the time we left, he'd have a pretty good feel for the city's character. Therefore, to arrive at the outdoor oasis we traversed Dilworth, an area of  older, but stately and gorgeously-maintained houses with pristine lawns and mature trees.

I then navigated us through the Uptown section again, so the boys could see it in the daylight (and marvel once more at how close we came to the football stadium--which never ceases to amaze and delight them, evidently). Finally, we cruised through South End, an upscale district that boasts historical architecture, but is also newly revitalized with fancy eateries and shops.

At the end of all this, without needing to put forth much effort at all, I succeeded in showing the kids that Charlotte is a pleasantly-sized, accessible, attractive, fun city (and...ahem....only 9 miles away from UNCC...which is going to have its own campus light rail stop, projected to open in the Spring of '18. Not only will the train obviously provide students a simple way to get into town, but also the cost of riding will be included in tuition. Just sayin'...)

Even if Derek doesn't end up attending the university, he and Riley are now both familiar with and appreciative of North Carolina's largest city. My work here is done! Let the boys tackle their pile of unwashed clothing--I've earned some sparkling cider...and then, a nap...

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Cheers for Charlotte

Well, I'm absolutely thrilled to be able to report that Derek is winding down his own personal College Application Season, with 6 submitted, and only 1 more to finish up. However, Team WestEnders (the High School Senior and his Support Staff, as they shall be known in this case) also had to address another important piece that was still missing from the "Which U. for You?" puzzle: one final institution on his list that he hadn't yet paid a visit. Thus with a day off from school to honor our nation's veterans, the teenagers and I headed for Charlotte, to spend an afternoon with UNC Chapel Hill's southwestern cousin of the same name.

Now, I've been to Charlotte on a couple of solo field trip occasions already, so I already knew how much I liked the city. I'd even spent a short time on campus once, visiting UNCC's lovely and serene botanical garden. On this trip, though, we were going for the full "prospective student" experience--with the formal presentation, the student ambassador, the guided walking tour....in other words, the whole shebang.

So we cruised into the designated parking deck about 30 minutes ahead of schedule. (I know: Whaaaat? This is just soooo unlike us! But trust me, it wasn't exactly planned; rather, it came from skipping lunch. Again, very uncharacteristic, but the way the drive worked out, we had to choose between arriving a little late, or eating, and we voted for the "quick snacks from a convenience store and being on time" option...aren't we such the responsible ones?) From there, a shuttle whisked us over to the Student Union, where we were able to kill time procuring a delicious Starbucks beverage (um....yeah, that would be only ME), and goofing around in the bookstore--where we were impressed by the staggering variety of high-quality apparel, much of it sporting UNCC's forest green color and 49ers logo.

Next we politely listened to the official "get to know our institution" talk, joined our designated undergrad...and boarded another bus, for  a driving loop around the grounds. This brings up a couple of things I noticed immediately about this particular campus: it's pretty vast (1,000 acres, according to the brochure), and there are shuttles running every which way, seemingly continuously, to enable people to get to all corners of the complex. There are also bike-share stations scattered about, where students can borrow a (free) two-wheeler to negotiate the terrain more quickly than they could on foot. And according to our guides, there are ZipCars that can be similarly checked out as well! Finally, along with the size of the place, all 3 of us noticed that a great deal of the environment is lush and green, featuring manicured lawns, picturesque landscaping and a veritable bonanza of trees, everywhere you look.
Of course, we made the the usual stops: the library, a residence hall (utilizing a suite-style setup--3 bedrooms with a shared sitting room and bathroom-- that seemed pretty ritzy for a college, to be honest), a classroom, blah blah blah. All in all, Derek came away with an even more positive impression than I had hoped for...so the bottom line is, even if UNCC isn't one of his top choices, at least now he knows he likes it there, and could see himself attending. (Mission...Part 1...accomplished...)

One agenda item they hit pretty hard during the introduction was how much it benefits the university to be located in such proximity to a city like Charlotte, with all of the opportunities it offers for student enrichment, such as internships, service projects, etc. Now that the institutional propaganda had wrapped up, it was up to ME to continue the extracurricular portion of our day, and sell Charlotte to the boys as a desirable destination for their possible future educational endeavors.

With this in mind, I'd researched an independent little deli-type joint where I thought we could eat dinner. It resided in the Plaza Midwood neighborhood, which as we strolled through on foot after parking the car, we agreed gives off a kind of artsy, kitschy, funky vibe. It was interesting and potentially entertaining...but alas, the deli counter (inexplicably) closes at 6 p.m. (Seriously? What's UP with that?) So, without a backup plan, I made an Executive Decision to just...wing it...and let the chips fall as they may, so to speak. Fortunately, I could see the city's skyline off to my left, so I pointed the Subaru that way, and navigated by..."feel"...towards what I hoped was the center of the action.

And the...gods of exploration...apparently blessed my journey (oh, and also the fact that Charlotte's a pleasantly simple city to get around in...) since we came into the middle of the Uptown area, pretty much exactly where I wanted to be. (Whew! Thank you....Magellan? Sure, we'll go with that...) Now that I recognized my surroundings, I confidently drove towards where I remembered the Spectrum Center being (the NBA Hornets' arena), which served the dual purpose of A) providing the certainty of parking decks in which to stash the vehicle for a while and B) causing the boys to gape in awe at being close enough to touch a major sports venue. (Point: Mom.)

Having safely tucked the automobile into a spot, we happily hoofed it up and down the main thoroughfare--ostensibly keeping an eye out for someplace to grab a meal, but also people-watching, and taking in the ambiance. About that: Charlotte's city center features a cool mix of big business (the 3rd largest banking center in the U.S., behind NYC and San Fran, with the soaring, glass-encrusted skyscrapers to show for it), unique shops, trendy restaurants and bars, museums, theaters...and a smattering of chain stores and fast food thrown into the stew. And among all the bright lights and flashing signs that demand your attention, there are also gorgeous fountains and mini-waterfall installments, as well as historical statues and sculptures randomly scattered throughout the pedestrian bustle.

Fortunately, Derek and Riley--who are generally not terribly fond of big city situations-- took to Charlotte's cozier, more friendly personality immediately. Yeah, and it didn't hurt that at some point during our wanderings, we found ourselves close enough to the Carolina Panthers' stadium to have the glowing facade looming over us...which caused yet another "Ooh, aah" moment for the ESPN-loving boys.

At this point it had gotten late enough that most non-swanky eateries had closed, but we managed to find a Qdoba that was still serving (and allowing us refuge from the chilly wind, which had begun to make us shiver...dressed as we were for more typical NC November balminess!). Therefore, full, warm, and content, we unanimously agreed that our first foray into Charlotte had been a rousing success, and we were all quite satisfied with our evening. Better yet, Derek expressed a wish to come back the next day, to venture into some other parts of the city, before heading back to our own corner of the state. So I do believe I'd have to say: Mission Part 2...achieved! Yaaaayyyy...everybody wins!