Invaders from the North!

While I don't recall the exact circumstances of the conversation, several months ago my sister and I happened to be lamenting the utterly woeful state of our favorite Major League team, the Baltimore Orioles. At some point during our commiseration, I jokingly suggested that if she wanted to see some quality baseball for a change, she could come visit us, and we'd go to a Durham Bulls game. (Although they're only AAA-level [affiliated with the Tampa Bay Rays] they consistently lead their division...and at least win more games than they lose, which is a HUGE improvement over the Os...)

Her lighthearted reply of "I just might do that!" immediately inspired me to look up the schedule, specifically focusing on when the Bulls and rival Norfolk Tides would face each other--so we could treat our potential guests to a minor league version of the Rays versus Orioles. I discovered that the two teams would meet...in NC...on a weekend...only one time during the Summer, giving us a single shot to pull this scheme together. And with that information, an Extended WestEnders Plan began to take shape.


It quickly ballooned into a full-blown...Southern Campaign...in which my sister, brother, and his 3 kids would road-trip down together (in a rented tank...um "Tahoe") and stay with us for 4 days. Since it would be their first "taste of the Triangle", if you will, we wanted to have enough time to show them some of our favorite spots, and for them to hopefully get a full appreciation of our lovely area and all it has to offer.

With that in mind, we hit the ground running shortly after they carefully navigated the ginormous SUV up our driveway on Friday at lunchtime. After some sustenance and catch-up chatting, we decided to kick off the festivities with the requisite Chapel Hill/Carrboro Walking Tour. This involves parking in a (free!) garage, and then strolling the length of Franklin Street, down to the University of North Carolina's campus at the opposite end. Along the way there's always ample opportunity for people-watching (although the coeds are away until next month, there are tourists or groups of potential students milling around at all times), window-shopping (at the quirky boutiques and fan-gear stores that abound up and down the street)...and in this case, beverage-purchasing, since it felt like, oh, approximately 142 degrees with the combined heat and humidity of the afternoon.

Yet we persevered, braving the sweaty conditions and continuing to march resolutely along like we were a troop of explorers...on some kind of assigned mission. Fortunately, we reached the shady grounds of UNC without anyone fainting from heat exhaustion or dehydration, and we rallied when we were able to duck underneath the tall, stately trees and get a break from the relentless sun. Then I led the gang ("And we're walking--no, we're walking THIS WAY. Pay attention!") over to the Old Well, whose historical significance I'd been sharing to those who would listen, and we politely asked other non-native strangers to take our picture in front of the iconic landmark.

Next...I'm not sure who it was...but someone made a fatal error (Okay, okay, it might have been me...) by mentioning that one could, theoretically, reach the football venue by continuing to follow our current path and cutting across campus. Well, my older nephew's eyes lit up like sparklers on the 4th of July, and that was all it took for this to become our next target. But along the way, we luckily had to pass by the bookstore, which not only is filled with interesting and sometimes hilarious swag representing the university...but also offers the blessed relief of air conditioning for as long as we chose to linger and browse.

Now, bear with me here for a tangential, PG-13 moment: during Team WestEnders' initial foray into this establishment 5 years ago, one of the very first items that we stumbled upon was a rack full of...stuffed...viruses and other medical whatnot. I'm not kidding--they're fuzzy, brightly colored, and range from super-geekily-cool (the flu, e. coli, a brain cell), to mildly inappropriate (a sperm and egg) to...downright NSFW, like...herpes...and "the clap", if you can believe it. I'll give you ONE guess as to where my beloved fam immediately gravitated? Yep, my younger nephew grabbed a cute, furry specimen, glanced at the tag, and in a totally not-using-your-inside-voice instant, gleefully yelled, "Hey, I found chlamydia!"

Oh, for the love of...I swear, this caused me an internal struggle: whether I was more horrified...or secretly pleased that our public school education apparently teaches them how to both read and pronounce the names of common STIs accurately. ("The more you know...?" Whatever...) Meanwhile, the rest of us vigorously shushed him, while also furtively glancing around to see if anyone else in the place had heard his outburst and was giving us the stink eye...and slapping our foreheads. (No one seemed to notice or care, thank goodness...which leads me to suspect that this might actually be a regular occurrence.)

I, myself, had a brief impulse to sidle away and lose myself among the racks of clothing, pretending I'd never seen these people before--but it wouldn't have worked anyway, since they kept following me. And obviously, for the rest of the day, no matter what we might be doing or where we were at the time, there would be an occasional...I don't know...battle cry?...of "chlamydia!" interjected loudly and nonsensically into conversation. Siiighhhh....and can I just say it's no wonder the cousins get along like gangbusters, since they're all apparently BIG HONKING GOOBERHEADS...)


Anyway, after that little episode, we completed our promised pilgrimage to Kenan Memorial Stadium, to gaze upon the Carolina-blue seats and brand new turf they've just installed for the upcoming season. Once the sports fans were satisfied, we proceeded to hike back to the car and return home to chill for the rest of the evening, with some television and local pizza (Mellow Mushroom, which I realize is a chain, but we count it anyway, since it's fancier and less common than, say, Domino's or Papa John's).

So, I'd have to conclude that we successfully conquered the hometown(s), which was vitally important, since I'd promised my sister some extra time in Durham the next day before our baseball outing, so she could make her spiritual journey to...that other school we don't talk about, which starts with a "D". Yep, I def needed a good night's sleep before that, for sure! Peace out, Chapelboro...