September Saga (so far)

Well, it's only Wednesday, but already it's been a long week of...let's call them "challenges" (just to be positive and proactive and...stuff). Our first issue involved Riley, who after cruising along at the beginning of 3rd grade, suddenly started kicking off every weekday by curling up in a ball, sobbing pitifully about how he "didn't want to go to school" and "was going to miss Mommy so much while he was gone." I'll admit, the first time this happened I gaped at him like he's sprouted antennae or broken out in purple polka-dots. This kid has been contentedly, independently marching off to school since he was 3 (which is incidentally the last time he collapsed in tears about it--I have the preschool photos to back me up). I was both taken aback by his behavior and stymied as to what could possibly be going on to cause these daily histrionics. Okay, he has a new teacher for the first time in 2 years; and his entire routine has changed, with Derek leaving before he gets up in the morning; and his classwork is supposed to be more advanced...oh, I guess he has some pretty solid reasons for feeling a bit out-of-sorts this September, after all. I've never dealt with a kid who gave me grief about going to school, so I was at a bit of a loss as to how to manage the situation. Faced with a clingy, weepy 8-year old in the mornings (NOT my best think-fast and create-a-solution time of day) I resorted to a few classic Parental Tools: the confidence-building Pep Talk and the comforting Token of Affection. For Riley, this meant that I presented him with a sincere, rah-rah "You Can Do It" speech, and a small object he could put in his pocket to remind him of me during his strenuous academic day. (Of all the possible mementos he could have selected, he chose a Subaru keychain--which still totally cracks me up. But hey, whatever works, right?)

Not to be left out of the emotional minefield, Derek had his own minor meltdown...over homework. It seems that he was supposed to find the "Interquartile Range" for a set of data, and he couldn't figure out how to do it. My super-helpful Mom response ran something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, you need to calculate the WHAT?" (In my head I added "What the heck's a "quartile" and who cares what its "range: is? Let it be Free Range! Set the quartiles loose! There, are we done?) "Well," he matter-of-factly clarified, "I already know how to set the Upper and Lower Quartiles, but I'm confused about how to find the IQR." Um, that makes two of us, pal! So I (gave an inward sigh) buried my nose in his textbook, found the step-by-step instructions, and worked through it. (I refrained--with some difficulty--from mentioning to Derek how much I had despised my own Statistics class in college...in fact, I vividly recall heaving my book across the room in frustration on more than one occasion while struggling to complete my assignment. Good times. And now we get to relive that experience...in 6th grade...awesome.) Anyway, my explanation didn't jive with what Derek remembered from the lecture in class, so he left it blank and resolved to ask his teacher the next day. (For the record, it turns out that I had understood it correctly--yes! A stunning victory over Measures of Central Tendency!) Just when I was ready to pat myself on the back for escaping the Math Trap with minimal damage (and/or Mom Embarrassment), there turned out to be more excitement. We also had to use a formula to determine if there were any Outliers in the set of numbers (Math--it's a whole other language, isn't it?). The fun just never ends around here, I swear!

As if that weren't enough, on top of our academic angst we were treated to a raging ant infestation, due to the torrential rains we've received over the past several weeks. Hmm...maybe if I give the uninvited visitors some small souvenirs to remember me by (cookie crumbs?), they'll leave quietly...and carry Derek's homework away with them! (Although I wouldn't look forward to that phone call from the Middle School Principal--"But it's true, the ants DID steal his paper!") Is it unreasonable to hope for a definitive decrease in drama for the rest of the week?