You Heard It Here First, Folks...

After all the creative collaboration, and the practicing, and the elaborate preparations, the Big Day finally arrived. Which day would that be, you ask? Well, finally, the long-awaited, highly-anticipated debut concert for Derek's and Riley's band would be presented to their adoring public (all 2 of them--who would also of course be known as "their parents"). The boys approached this endeavor with all the gravity of Springsteen playing a gig at the Meadowlands...even though the venue would be much less...memorable. (Yeah, Mom and Dad's Basement just doesn't command the same respect, does it? Even the Boss had to start somewhere, I suppose...) So, they made us a ticket:

(And what a bargain! As official guinea pigs--I mean "first fans ever"--we got a freebie this time. Although I imagine in the future we'll be expected to pay the cover charge, just like the rest of the masses...assuming there are, eventually, actual attendees that aren't directly related to the musicians by blood...)

Anyway, moving on...they also printed out a Program with a Setlist:

You'll notice that they're called Dr. Rock and the Kraken. (Please don't ask me, I have no idea why. I think Derek is supposed to be the doctor...leaving Riley as the...mythological sea monster...perhaps that's a good question for their inaugural Post-Show Interview...) And their (right now completely theoretical) album is titled Unicorns from Outer Space. (Once again: I. Do. Not. Know.) The lyrics include such memorable lines as: "I have a car for every country. That's how many I've stolen. I've taken so much money I could build an alley to go bowlin'" from Lawbreaker and "Our Tyrannosaurus is downright swaggy. But when he has motion sickness get a really big baggie. When you get hungry get a steak for you. When Rex gets hungry get some caribou" from Bombs in Vegas. And so without further ado, here's a taste of the action:

I know the words are difficult to understand, but what's really amusing to me is how thoroughly they have already established their Band Personas. Riley, total Lead Singer, out in front of the stage, in the (hypothetical) spotlight. And Derek usually in the back, content with his drum solos...making Rock Star Face. They were so adrenalized by their first performance that they immediately started discussing penning their next group of songs so they could put together a longer  show. But for tonight, the Mother of the Band/Head Groupie (until I'm displaced by squealing preteen girls. Heaven help us...) had to cut the evening short...by enforcing Musician Bedtime. Long live Rock and Roll!