Christmas, unwrapped

Okay, I'm behind, so this is going to be a...hmm, how shall I put this..."Aaahhh, gotta get this all down before I forget something" kind of post. There, consider yourself warned...

Well, the week leading up to Christmas was quite the anticipation-fest. You see, Derek and I had discussed (well, "negotiated" is more like it...) his "special present" quite some time ago--relating to his iPod Touch, which had taken to behaving in an increasingly erratic fashion. We decided that, rather than replace it, we'd just upgrade him to a smartphone that could accomplish all of the tasks he wanted (basically: texting, watching SportsCenter videos, and playing music and games). As his iPod started kicking him out of apps, refusing to run programs, and basically being a major pain in the tushie, he began eagerly counting down to the big exchange. So, having a free day on the 23rd, I took the opportunity to lock myself in the study and set up his device. What I neglected to think about was that, by activating the new phone...I cancelled the old one...requiring me to then relinquish his gift two full days early. Um, Merry...Pre-Christmas, sweetie! (He was thrilled, so it was worth it...) Then there's Riley...who inherited the unfortunate "impatience gene" from my side of the family. (See, isn't that just soooo admirably honest of me?) A few days before the official gifting occasion, he purposely came all the way upstairs and strolled into my room, simply to point out that it was "the day before Christmas Eve!" (You know, in case I had been...in a cave somewhere...and was therefore caught unawares...how...thoughtful?) In our house, we allow one package to be opened on the 24th, and he was already practically beside himself with pent-up excitement. He did manage to contain himself--barely--and was enchanted with his Kindle when (finally) allowed to rip into the box.

Then on Christmas morning, Derek calmly and methodically unwrapped his surprises...with the exception of the one that his father had found especially for him (at the local drugstore, so you can imagine how very rare and precious it was)...which disrupted the proceedings with uproarious glee. What could have caused such a reaction? Picture, if you will, a product called...Anti-Monkey-Butt Powder (totally NOT making this up). It's a...um...personal care item designed to prevent..."chafing"...and it smells remarkably like bananas. (Yeeeaaaahhh. Sometimes I just shake my head...) When we got back on track, Riley finished revealing his treasures and declared that he had received "the best 3 Christmas presents EVER!": the aforementioned e-reader; a stuffed TCU Horned Frogs mascot that reverses into a football; and a Nerf gun that releases velcro-tipped darts. An epic battle immediately ensued, of course, with much running amok through the various levels of the house, yelling of battle cries, and the distinctive sound of ammo being unstuck from clothes. But the punctuation mark for the day may have been provided by Riley, who paused in his combat situation for a moment to muse, "Huh, ironically, I shot the pillow that says 'Let there be peace'!"

And on that note, God bless us, every one : )