Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Making the Band (kiddie style)

"Mom, it's time for band practice!" my son bellowed as he thundered past me out the door, guitar in hand. The neighborhood "gang", apparently bored with their daily regimen of basketball/baseball/soccer/skateboarding, had decided to add music to the mix.

So this Motley Crew (12-year old boy, my 9 and 5-year old sons, 8 and 6-year old sister and brother) huddled on the back porch for a "band meeting", clutching handwritten lyrics, discussing which songs to sing and which instruments to assign. These negotiations became quite heated, as 6-year old Gary, lacking musical experience, nevertheless insisted they find something for him to do. (Sadly, they didn't have a tambourine, but eventually settled on maracas).

The next roadblock to their success came when it was time to decide on singers. The lone female (Diva-in-training) demanded that she sing lead. And while my older son is content to play guitar and avoid the spotlight, the younger one vigorously campaigned for the job of frontman. So, in the time-honored manner of musicians everywhere, they held "auditions". It was Junior American Idol, complete with a panel of judges and criticial comments Simon Cowell himself would have loved. ("Can you sing louder"? "You have to be on key"! "Get off the stage"!)

I don't think they've actually rehearsed a song yet, what with all the bickering and subsequent ego-soothing that has to be done, not to mention that at least one person storms out of each practice session, dramatically proclaiming, "That's it, I quit!"

Isn't that adorable? They don't even have a band name, and they're already having "creative differences"! Next they can kick someone out for his or her "attitude problem". Or someone can declare that they're leaving to pursue "solo projects". They can disappoint their tearful fans by breaking up...then call a Press Conference to announce a change of heart...and a Reunion Tour! I think they need a Manager; I'm going to go write myself a contract...including a nice 20% fee. Rock on!

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