A Bee in my Bonnet...

Continuing this week's Homework Theme, let's move on to Riley's current after-school task. Remember how I described feeling relieved and grateful that in Middle School the focus of homework has shifted from Parental Supervision to Student Self-Management, with kids expected to oversee their own math problems, reading logs, short-essay analyses, and even long term multi-media projects? In a word: delightful. In contrast, Riley remains firmly entrenched in the Elementary School system, which still emphasizes parental signing off on completed tasks (irritating, but do-able), adult assistance for producing detailed, in-depth written responses to comprehension questions (totally my forte, so not a problem)...and unfortunately, production of crafty-type projects. (Ugh--sooooo over it already!)

Now, I've never been what you'd call an "artsy" person. Markers, construction paper, popsicle sticks, glitter glue--I've kept all these in the house for the boys to goof around with since they were pre-schoolers. But you'd be hard pressed to find me at the table with them, concocting some kind of sparkly masterpiece. Just not my thing. So over the years, when assignments have cropped up requiring the envisioning and constructing of a...creative...thingamabob...my typical response has been to heave a massive inner woe-is-me sigh, and then resign myself to supporting my child in making the best darn...whatever-it-may-be...that we can. (All the while, looking longingly forward to the blessed time when we can be DONE with this "demonstrate your comprehension through expressive channels" nonsense.)

Sooo, this time, it's the *#$%--I mean "entertaining and educational"--Honeybee Project. To begin: read informative text about the species, highlighting important information. (Yes! Love it!) Next, label the bee's structures as you identify them on this diagram. (Terrific! And useful! Plus, you get to use the word "proboscis", which is tons of fun--go ahead, try it!) Then, plan your model by listing what supplies you'll need to represent each part. (Uh oh. Here we go...) Finally, go ahead and build your bee! (Um...must we? I mean...yaaaaay?) Of course we first had to undertake the obligatory trek to Michael's. (What, you thought I had a ready stash of pipe cleaners, styrofoam balls, and shiny pom-poms lying around the house? I wish!) Twenty bucks later, we owned the necessary items to assemble this precious bee. Then it became just a matter of gluing and painting and attaching...until we had something that resembled...well to be perfectly objective, it's more of an impressionistic view of the honeybees found in nature, rather than a strictly realistic rendition.

And really, that's my complaint about this whole process: how is this artistic exercise actually teaching kids about bees? 'Cuz I've seen bees, you know...and they don't look a whole lot like our--admittedly cute--sculpture. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the special bonding time that Riley and I have spent fashioning our bee. But (I can't believe I'm saying this) what ever happened to good old research? For example, we could have maybe watched a documentary about bees and the critical role they play in supporting the environment. Or we could have taken an Observation Walk outside, and photographed bees in their natural habitat, performing their duties. (Although to be completely fair, I suspect a teacher is prohibited from suggesting this, due to the risk of stings, anaphylactic shock, and whatnot.) I'm just saying, aside from indulging your inner artist, I fail to see the value in these kinds of homework assignments. (And did I mention that it was his ONLY reading homework for THREE WEEKS? Not coincidentally: the longest three weeks of the entire school year as far as I'm concerned.)

But, the end is finally within reach. Riley's teacher set the due date for after Memorial Day (to enable all the slackers who ignored the assignment for a month to throw something together over the long weekend, no doubt). So next Tuesday, I'll deliver Riley and his little friend to school...and we can say a hearty "Buzz Off" to the bee project!