Whew! I'm not gonna lie, folks, that was possibly the rockiest first week of school I've ever experienced. And I'm not even the one who has to figure out all the "getting back into a routine", and "juggling a whole bunch of new demands", and...what else...oh, yeah, "learning"...and whatnot! The first inkling that things were not going to be as easy as I'd led myself to believe came on Monday--that's right, at the end of Day One. When Riley arrived home after soccer practice, I greeted him with a chipper, "So, how was your day, buddy?" Naturally, I was anticipating a torrent of details about his schedule, courses, teachers, etc. What I actually got was an impassioned, "I HATE High School."
Whoooaaaa....not where I thought that was going--but okay, tell me more. He elaborated, "It didn't go well. There's tons of people, and not a lot of space. The classrooms are tiny, dark, and uninviting. I know 4 people per class, max. It seems really hard. The expectations are very high." Somewhat stunned by his outburst already, I was trying to formulate a positive, supportive response when he added his last comment, "I'm stressed and tired...but I'm holding it together." (That last part was delivered with a barely audible quaver in his voice that spoke volumes about his emotional state at that moment, and it just about broke my heart, I tell ya.)
Before addressing all...that...I bought myself some time by changing the subject to ask him how the sports portion of his day had gone. He cheered up instantly and replied, "The only bright spot in my day, and looking forward to it got me through school." Well, at least there was that little ray of sunshine to hold onto...because unfortunately, his night didn't improve much from there. He had several hours of homework to knock out, as well as a stack of forms to get signed. (I know--welcome to 9th grade, right? You'd think they could have eased the poor kids into High School, but nooooo....) Plus, as an extra-special bonus, he'd already decided he wanted to make a change to his schedule-- which normally isn't too big a deal, really. But to him this represented one more gigantic worry in a brain that was already filled with a daunting To Do List.
There was nothing for it, obviously, but to....I don't know....play through the pain? I helped him out with what I could, assignment-wise...but I think my most valuable contribution might very well have come in the form of: chocolate. You see, there was leftover dessert from his birthday, so in a moment of inspiration, I suggested that he at some point plan to pause in his labors for a Cake Time-Out. He took me up on this without hesitation, so at 9:45 p.m. he came and found me and announced, "I'm ready for cake now. I deserve it!" (Oh, don't we ALL, honey...) As he licked the plate clean he noted, "I think I'm gonna need this all week. Can you keep the cake coming, Mom?" Then he quickly amended, "You can switch it up if you want--any kind of treat you feel like making!" (Um...that would be an unequivocal YES, kiddo. I mean, whatever it takes to help you through this tough period, of course. That's just the kind of...sweet-tooth-enabling mother...I am...)
It also seemed like a wise idea to enlist the older brother to step in with some "been there, done that" perspective. Derek obligingly reassured Riley that his first impression of High School did NOT mean he was destined for a super-demanding year with an impossible workload. Case in point: Derek found out that--since they each had been placed with the same History teacher in their respective Freshman years--they'd both been tasked with writing an introduction letter to turn in on the second day. Riley commented that he's spent some time composing his...and Derek actually interrupted him by bursting into laughter. When asked what could possibly be so funny about an assigned task, Derek exclaimed, "I made the whole thing up! I said I moved here from Juneau, Alaska!"
Riley and I both were somewhat horrified by this unapologetic admission of...bald-faced fibbery...but it did serve to highlight an important point: probably the most useful skill Riley will have an opportunity to master this year is how to manage his own...Type-A perfectionist tendencies. Like Derek--for whom this comes much more naturally than it does for Riley or me--he'll figure out what requires his full attention and effort, and what can be done...."good enough". (For example, remember that fabricated History letter? Riley wondered what grade Derek had received on it, and the answer was "100%!" Ay yi yi...since the purpose was to illustrate a point for Riley, I'm just gonna bite my tongue and let this one slide...)
Anyway, the next day's drama revolved around turning in the dang "Schedule Change Request"--which we'd filled out, but I'd apparently forgotten to sign. A flurry of texts back and forth between Riley and the parentals-on-standby--negotiating how and when to complete the transaction--finally resulted in Husband popping over at lunchtime to add his illegible scribble, so that Riley could turn the paper over to the Guidance Office. Luckily, after that little bump in the road the process was quite painless, and by the end of the school day Riley had been granted permission to join his new class. The only downside was that, in order to make his schedule work, he had to move to another Spanish section...with a different teacher. Pfftt--no problem, yeah? Suuuure...except that his maestra de espanol had been the ONE instructor he was actually excited about. Siiighhhh...
Okay, deep breath, shoulders back, chin up....here comes Wednesday. (Good heavens, could this week go any more slowly? Or traumatically? Never mind...don't answer that...) In the middle of the day, I got a text from Riley, with a "lunchtime update". He reported that everything with his new schedule had gone smoothly...he was having his best day yet...and he liked his Spanish teacher. Yaaaaaayyyyy! Now, we weren't quite out of the woods yet, since that afternoon he'd be journeying with the soccer team to their first away-game of the season, which happened to be about an hour's travel. Given the distance, the duration of the match, the necessity of stopping to feed the ravenous hordes on the way back...and then the inevitable homework (and shower--let's not forget that....please!), it made for a very late night for an already tired teenager.
But then, we'd all somehow managed to survive until Thursday--putting us one day closer to the much-needed breather that would be heralded by the arrival of the blessed Labor Day weekend. Another upbeat lunchtime report seemed to indicate that Riley was settling in and feeling more optimistic about this whole High School shebang. Don't get me wrong, he was increasingly exhausted....the loads of evening homework continued unabated thus far...he was still feeling some pressure from all the moving parts he had to manage...but you'd be amazed at how many challenges can be overcome by indulging in a simple ritual to soothe one's jangled nerves.
No, I'm not talking about chamomile tea, or...meditation (although I suspect the latter would be reeeaaally beneficial for us, and we totally should try it...someday), but rather the good old-fashioned...pre-bedtime Brownie Break. (Yeah, the cake eventually ran out...) And when those are gone, we might have to move on to chocolate chip cookies. Hey, it's a looooong school year, and I'm absolutely committed to doing whatever it takes to support my kid in having a successful, happy 9th grade experience! Although if we keep this up, I might have to increase the intensity of my workouts, to avoid the dreaded Freshman...Mom...15! (I swear, the sacrifices we make for our children...ha!)
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