Baseball = Life

As a lifelong baseball lover, I have had many a fruitless argument with those who claim that "football is much more exciting" or "basketball is better because there's more scoring"...or other such nonsense. Those people, if they have wandered here by mistake, should stop reading right now. The truth is, pitchers and catchers report to Florida or Arizona in less than 2 weeks (10 days, if you're really counting, like me), and I have both baseball and Spring on the brain. So to pass some time, a few rules for life, borrowed from America's Game...
--Be respectful and watch your language, or you might get thrown out!
--Listen to your coaches, because they know more than you and want to help you improve.
--Play fairly (except when the pitcher isn't watching, then by all means steal a base).
--Take turns; wait patiently; and cheer for your teammates when you're on the bench.
--Don't let your mind wander, lest you get hit by a foul ball or flying bat.
--Choose to feed your body in a way that will make you strong and healthy (and that won't land you in JAIL, duh!)
--Try your best, but keep in mind that even excellent hitters fail 2/3 of the time at the plate!
--Remember it's a long season, so even if today sucked, tomorrow's a brand new game. (And they average your stats, so the results look better...eventually.)
With apologies to Crash Davis, I will end with these profound words: "Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes...it rains."

Play Ball!